The Starving Games Review

The Starving Games Review

Starring: Maiara Walsh, Cody Christian, Brant Daugherty

Director: Jason Friedberg & Aaron Seltzer

Year: 2013

 

So yeah, this movie exists. This is the part where I say how lazy this film duo is, but I remind myself the reason I started this movie too begin with was I hadn’t done a movie review in awhile, and I took the easy road and thought I’d just do this. Laziness makes the world go around people. So yeah, I guess you’ve seen the Starving Games after looking at the cover. It’s the next big movie parody, and this ones on the Hunger Games... yay... and this one didn’t even make it into theaters so you know it’ll be good, right? Oh God this movie fucking sucks. But it knows it sucks! You can see the actors behind their faces they know they’re in a terrible movie, but they don’t give a shit, they’re just happy too be anywhere! But it’s my job too say why. First off, the references are just slapped together. Anything in the past five years, it’ll work. Throw in random internet stuff while you’re at it, teenagers are stupid enough too buy it, right? And an Avatar reference, one enough for it to make it too the cover... no! No! No! No! NO!!!!! God dammit! A monkey and a toddler sitting on a typewriter can do better than that! ugh. Anyway, back too the movie. I guess a big reason this movie has a problem it really couldn’t care less, or too try anything new. It feels like these guys have made a formula of throwing together random movie stuff too squeeze a movie, and it’s worked in the past, so wouldn’t it now? But part of parody is making the world you’re making fun of so we feel like we’re in it, and then take us off guard. And by take us off guard I don’t mean let characters get hit by something in a new place. Actually do something creative. And actually make me feel like I’m watching the Hunger Games. These sets look like they’re filmed in a backyard. And these actors look like kids at my high school theatre... but worse! And plot in the movie I don’t mind getting twisted, but it’s missing big characters from the Hunger Games, and considering Woody Harrelson in his terrible wig in the Hunger Games was the parody-able thing about those films, I’m wondering why the fuck he’s not in this! Anyway, this movie is just sort of dribble. Did it make me laugh ever. Sort of yeah. Like I thought they made good use of Katniss’s mom, but then they replayed that joke like ten fucking times. And then they had this thing with one of the commentators, but they pretty much milked that joke into submission as well. And I’m the guy who looks for positive things about movies, but all I can grab are shitty little scenes where I chuckled! There was... that joke about Nicki Minaj and Lady Gaga? That was kind of funny. Oh, I will say the guy who played President Snow (he’s called President Snowballs in this, which... is cringe worthy in itself, but I’ll get too that) that guy I liked. Just his air he gave Snow I liked, and he actually made me laugh. Probably my favorite part about the movie. Anyway, another thing, just call these characters by their fucking names. Again, you’re taking us out of the world, you’re reminding everyone they’re watching something much more stupid, and this time most of them don’t even half shitty little funny puns. They’re just stupid versions of they’re names! And is this movie even making a big shit on the world? No, nobody gives a shit about a piece of shit that’s just going too go down the toilet a minute later. The actors probably don’t care they’re in a bad movie, they’re just there to show up, take a paycheck, and have fun while they’re there. The directors, I don’t really want too imagine what the hell is going through their mind, but let’s just say they got lazy. And yeah, that’s all I got. Was it awful? Of course, it was just bad, but it doesn’t leave a bad taste in your mouth. It’s like the crap on the sidewalk. You see it, say ew, and walk away.

 

The Starving Games gets a 1/5